Bionic Ass-Burgers

WHO! is America’s next top model? 

 The Hub and I watched 3 taped shows last night. BTW, do we still call it “taping a show” when you DVR it? Wouldn’t we call it “digitally recording” it? Hmm?

Last night Hubster and I watched 3 shoes that we had digitally recorded: The Bionic Woman, America’s Next Top Model, and Top Chef. I had some thoughts, and I would like to share. May I? Thanks.

The Bionic Woman is pretty good. I’m very glad that there is a vestige of the Shhh-shhh-shhh-shhh sound that happened when Lee Majors and Lindsay Wagner used their bionics. It’s a little covered up by newer sound effects, but it’s still there. Yay! When I was a kid (fogey!) half of us playground kids made “the sound” when we ran ANYWHERE. The playground was filled with kids hissing their way through playtime.

However, last night a new character arrived on the bionic scene. Old homosexual slur-face himself, Isaiah Washington. The hub told me that I should stop watching the show immediately, to show solidarity. (I think his ulterior motive is that he doesn’t like the show, and would rather not watch it anyway…) If I don’t watch this show, it wont make a difference in the bigger picture. I am not a Nielsen Family. What should I do?

I am pulling for Heather on America’s Next Top Model. She’s got Aspergers, y’all. I think that basically entails social disorder and problems with non-verbal communication. All of which is fine – it makes her stand out and she is doing well. The thing I dislike about Heather is that she calls it AhsBergers. Ahhhsbergers. No emphasis at all on ass. Then, last night, Tyra called it Assberjers. Lets get it right, people. It’s Ass-Burgers. Nummy ass burgers.

(I am going to spoil the Top Chef finale in the next paragraph, so be warned…)

Finally, Hung won Top Chef. That is gross. He is an automaton. He has no soul. Well, he didn’t have soul until the head judge told him that he didn’t have soul, then Hung was all “Look at my Soul! It’s so souly! Wee! Pretty, pretty soul!” Shuddup Hung. Dale should have won, cause he made me smile when he called everyone bitches. Hung sucks. Team Dale!

Hee. Ass burgers.

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4 Responses to Bionic Ass-Burgers

  1. luvflamingos says:

    I’m pulling for Miss Ass-Burgers too. She’s just trying to make it sound fancier than it is….Tomato….Tomahto. It’s ASS-BURGERS!

  2. Peg says:

    It is recording…..

  3. slingers says:

    Ah, Heather. Not my fave. All the black girls are better’n her. Autistic (ie, non-responsive) model? That’s like a mime having Tourette’s. Now THAT I’d pay money to see. But I do like Ass-burgers – I think I saw that on the Exotic Foods show with Andrew Zimmern.

  4. chris2fer says:

    Slingy! How the heck are ya?

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