Oh, What a night…
5 years and a few months ago I lost a friend. I’m not sure what happened. One day we were very close, talked several times a week, hung out, etc. The next day she was ignoring my calls and hanging up on me in Wal-mart and basically just cutting off contact. I tried to find out what was going on, but ultimately just had to let her go. It was painful. I slipped into a funk.
After a couple months of general funkiness I just had to do something new. I had to expand what my life had become. For years I had been saying to myself that I would join the Maine Gay Men’s Chorus, but had always chickened out. I decided that I would investigate the chorus some more, and went online to check it out. Lo and behold, an open rehearsal was the very next week. I told all sorts of people at work and in my life that I was going to go, just so I would have to.
Sabrina was very supportive. I printed out directions to the church where the rehearsal was to be held. We drove through them the day before. (Yes, I’m type A.) But finally, I was on my own. I realized that I would be the one walking into a group of 30 gay men, not knowing a single one, being immediately judged. I would be alone. I’m not ashamed to say that it scared the crap outta me.
The day came, and I dress myself in my best looking outfit. You know – the one that makes you look slender and like you work out. We all have one great outfit, right? I put it on and drove to the rehearsal. I sat in my car outside the church. I could actually hear my heart. I got out of the car and walked into the church. I walked downstairs. I opened the door. I entered the room.
30 pairs of eyes swiveled in my direction. I stood still, waiting for the nervousness to pass. I walked in.
Suddenly, from across the room a man approached me. He almost ran over to me. He did look familiar. He said my name. He shook my hand. He told me his name. He said that we were neighbors. He made me feel like I was not alone. Suddenly, I had found a friend.
He introduced me to all of the other guys. He actually was the president of the chorus. And yes, we had lived next door to each other for over a year. He was in the next apartment building to mine.
Three days later he suggested that we ride together to the first Chorus outing, since we lived so close together. We drove out to Pilgrim Lodge and spent the day singing and having lessons and getting to know each other.
At the end of the day he took me to meet a couple of his friends who lived in Gray. We laughed and ate and played games and really had a great time. I didn’t want it to end.
And, 5 years to the day yesterday, it still hasn’t.
I love you, Hub.